Back to Basics

My poor blog; I have neglected him for months! I am glad to say that things are going swell. My semester flew, I've developed some pretty solid relationships, and most importantly, God has been AMAZING. The Lord has been dealing with me and my stubborn heart for quite some time; I'm not going to say that I've got it all together now; in fact, I'm learning more about my heart's condition every day, however, He has been faithful in not only making my sinfulness transparent, but in also showing me that His grace is sufficient.

Today, as all the Bible study leaders prepped for next week's bible studies, we went over the last study of the semester. The last study is always the same one since it allows us to really stop and meditate on what God has taught us throughout the semester. I love this one. It's on Joshua 4 where God commands Joshua to tell one man from each tribe to take a stone from the Jordan and put them in their camp. That would serve as a memorial of when God stopped the flow of the Jordan so that the ark of the covenant of God crossed to the other side. The stones would help the Israelites remember God's power and faithfulness. The Israelites were unbelieving, ungrateful, unfaithful, and forgetful, yet He was always with them, He always cared, and His desire was to take them to a better place; all those faults are also found in me, yet His desires are the same for me as they were for them.

Just like the Israelites, we should also remember all that God has done in our lives, so the study is set up so that we go away and as we are still and silent before God, we are able to see all the ways in which the Lord has taught us. We are given stones so that we, too, have a memorial of God's faithfulness.

One word came to mind: Abide.

John 15 has been a huge part of my growth this semester. My heart is blessed every time I read this passage and it has become a constant prayer in my life.

"…apart from me you can do nothing."

God reminded me of this part when I was trying to do things on my own strength. He showed me through the simplest thing: waking up early. As I sat up from my bed, angry at myself for snoozing way too many times and knowing I wouldn't have time to have my normal quiet time, this verse was just audible to me. It was then that I realized that I had to come to a point of dependence on Him if I wanted to produce fruit. After that morning, God has been "pruning" me and working in me in ways that I can't even understand. The change in me hasn't been pleasant or isn't quite tangible and I often wonder if anything is even really happening, but as I learn about sanctification being a process, I cling on to His promises. All I have to do is remain in Him.

"…he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6

Today I was able to reflect on my lowest points this semester- how I felt, how it affected my relationship with Christ, and how I was going to respond. I saw that today, I am in a different place. I have found peace in Him in the midst of heartache, confusion, frustration, and doubt. He has given me joy and has promised that if His joy is in me, then my joy will be complete.

Oh God, you stay the same through the ages!